All because of Visa?

I had been apart from my family since last July due to visa restriction at China, mainly due to Olympic Games.

To other people this restriction it to strengthen the safety while the games begin, but to me this seen to be losing the tight relationship with my wife & daughter.

I been very lucky that, occasionally I been allowed to flight back to my hometown to meet my wife during her pregnancy and been very lucky that when she give birth i was around her and that make her feel more secure & comfortable during that session.

On one scene, I feel like losing her when she going to operation theater, especially when I see my baby girl but in about 30 ~ 45 min she still wasn’t come out from Operation theater.

I can’t control that feeling when I talk over the phone with one of my relative. Which she feel that I been very happy & exited being father, but actually I am kind like worry will waiting for my wife return from Operation Theater.

I been blaming this visa restriction because that separate my apart from my wife while she still under recover her delivered surgery, and I miss a lot of growth scene with my baby. And I am sure she won’t feel my love at this moment, even she have turn to 13 months now but I yet to give her my care & love.

No to mention that for my wife, as she been very independence as she it. She have this great characteristic and that make me feel comfortable while I am apart till now, and also the luckiest thing that all this while she been under a good care of her mom & grandma. With the family hood surround that my baby been very lucky and having very good growing environment.

Anyhow, they come back to my arm surrounding tomorrow, I will going to HKIA to fetch them and welcome them back, from that point my responsibility take place.

I have to blame China on Visa restriction…...

I have to thank my in law relative on the big help…...

License to kill

Base on the current news release of the suspect Abdul Razak Baginda from the case of Altantuya Shaaribu, showing that justice in Malaysia are heading to the new Era on showing the Political power above the law continuously by showed on "License to kill".

Cronyism still the only way..... after 51 years of independance in persuiting Malaysia growth....

One day

Human have very complecate mind & emotion, and it change most of the time under certain elemens...

What do we want for live ....
What do we need for relationship....
What do we expecting from people around you....
What do we need from this world....

After the long time chassing here and there, compare these and those....

One day, when we know what we need....
One day, when we know what relationship been looking for....
One day, when we know what we expecting from peoples around you....
One day, when we know what we need from this world....

Someone get what they want....
Someone still chassing for that....
Someone give up....


来也冲冲。。。 去也冲冲。。。
一生何求。。。

Tear in Heaven...

I have a very close friend of mine name Ary (Khurairy Said), we know each others since 1997 when i have start my job at Corner Peripheral ( now know as Seagate).

He was a technician for tape drive testing department, i am a technician from process engineering.

Over this years we been able to keep in touch and once a while we have some "tea tarik" session.
He having very strong in technical knowledge in term on computer hardware, which i get a lot of help from help before i joint Gateway Computer.

He also one of my source when his company have those refurbish unit, from their engineering & customer return sample. I bought couple desktop & hardware from him. So indirectly he is my main contact when i need a low cost desktop. With that he also provide me the unlimitation technical supported. I am ready appriciated that.

On my last time meeting him on early Oct 2008, he still doing me a favor on desktop hardwares. and advise on those solution on technical issue i have on those desktop i bought since 3 to 4 years back. He did that more toward friendship then favor. As we been sustaint out friendship since 1997.

More then 10 years we know each others, last fews days whihc 23 Oct i received a message from Skype on my others friend said he was passaway on that morning, i wasn'tbelieve that as we been jokes around most of the time, but with that i still make a long distance call to get this clarify, and finally i got the firm comfirmation that was true.... My friend Ary he was passaway.

In this fews days i keep gotten those sad message to notify not this bad news. The postmortem report mention that he dead under 'Acute Poisioning' by locked himself in a room.

What 'Acute Poisioning' mean..... .....

It's mean to me... due to toxic air in that room??? or other dose of drag ??? or food ???

it's mean to me more toward suicide, as he locked himself in the room...???
We don;t know how true is that, but only God.

What causing him can't till he make that decission cause he still having the good dinner session with another friend a week before.... mistery....

Human live always full of challenging pressurefull...
Everybody known that....
Direct & indirectly pressure from those elemens (Family relationship, Financial, Future career...etc) always being compare indirectly...

May God bless him in Heaven... safe his soul and safe his family future

Good bye Ary.... take a good rest and have fun in Heaven...

Miss you

it's my 2nd time away from my baby in the condition of she having fever. Even this time wasn't feel that bad like very first time i leave her under her fever condition.

She turn 1 year old now, in the comminucate with my wife she still having fever last night. That make me feel useless as i am away from home, just can pray for her recover soon and come back to me as soon as possible.

But the date for her to be here with me kind like set at beginning of Nov, and it's look to me still 3 week to go. I hope this date can come early.

I miss her badly today, until indirectly when i cook my lucnh today i sang a song which i used to sang for her when i hold her to sleep at night.

Live is great, which you have some one to miss in your life. Espacially when you miss you baby even on that moment you feel sad but good to know this perfect feel. This real feel wasn't come to your live frequent.

It's only come when someone & something you love wasn't being around you.

I learn that miss now from my little baby girl Rachel, she mean a lot to me...

I love you.... & miss you always...

Her pampering

I had been apart from my family since 23 June when their China visa expired. Thatmake me start missing my little Rachel as she used to be around my arm.

Her smile & sound always appear on my mind, especially when I am back to home after work.
Thing I miss the most is her pampering wishes, as she always make she special sound around my shoulder & ear. That make me feel i been pamper by my daughter, that will make me feel, i am a good father which i have my little girl pampering with me.

After 3 weeks plus, i been apart from her, she been used to the new environment at hometown, which with a lot of people & relative around her.
She been change to this new environment, peoples, they way people call her, play with her.
So, i have to admit that kid growth fast then what we think especially infant. I was keep losing her growth moment as I need to be away apart for work.

The night when i back to my hometown, i was very much wanted to see her. But when i back at home, she was out with my relative. A bit disappointed, as i unable to see she her immediately when I am home. But on the other hand i feel good as she been so popular by those ralative loves to be with her.

When she back home on that night, she can't recognize me as her 'papa', yeap... I know she still infant about 9 & half month olds, how can she know me is her 'papa'.
I hold her, she just make me feel like i am just like the others relative come to visit & play with her.

That take few days be be with her, which she a bit responsive to me and she like accompany, as time going i am not stranger to her anymore. This wasn't noticeable as she not a choosy type or anti stranger type of baby, which she able to familiar with stranger quickly and she not the make much noise with stranger.

But still lose & miss her pampering wishes, that only I can feel that when she awake in the middle of the night cry & look for someone, when I hold her that time I feel much more better that I been pampering by her, but that time she was in sleepy mode.

I spend most my valuable time with her & my wife, i always look for her when i free, i guess my wife know that, hope she won't feel strange on that, as I always love always with her, as only I miss my daughter more.

This days, before i left my family to work, my baby start to get new teeth, causes with those coming new teethes she refuse to eat solid food, which she used to complete that 3 time per day. And she has been unable to finish that cereal recently. Hope she will get off this soon.
I hope she pretty tooth like my wife, not to follow my 'rabbit teeth' pattern as that horrible tooth pattern to be in her mouth.

Wish her growth well, and i will always miss her especially her pampering.

日月谭

In the change on the Taiwan goverment which resume the direct flight in between China & Taiwan on the 4th July.

I am not part of the group who enjoy this very first direct flight.

Just happen that, I been in Taiwan on that duration.

I have to oppurtunities to visit one of the Taiwan famous tourist spot 日月谭 (Sun Moon Lake), This place 1 out of 12 tourist place in Taiwan strongly recomended by local traveller agent.

It's a natural lake, which combine between two lake 日谭 (Sun Lake) & 月谭 (Moon Lake), not just because of the lake view, there are a fews tourist place around this lake, the tourist can make drive in between that spot to spot by road transpotation or can cruse that by a boot.

The most impressed me actually is the cleanliness environment at 日月谭. I can see any single trash on the tourist spot's or when we flood by the boot on the lake.

That a very good job for Taiwan goverment and their people around, been keeping up very good effort to ensure the cleanliness environment for tourist.

I realise that, actually the numbers of the trash or recycle bin on this tourist spot actually wasn't enough, I as i have hardtime to figure out the trash been when i done with their famous 茶叶蛋 (Tradisional herb egg).

I do heard from the local people, goverment actually been budgeted some money to keep up the public facilities accordingly.

Current 三通 policy between China & Taiwan, hope this bring more fortune between them.